我在臨床做十六年，前幾年做的是精神病人，做精神病人對於我在做親職教育有很深的影響，因為精神病人其實是在囚籠裡頭不會回來的黑暗份子。原先我跟很多人一樣，一直認為一個人會住到精神病院一定是腦袋秀斗，前半段的假設是對的，但是有一部份的假設是錯的，我們以為他笨，事實上我在醫院裡頭看到很多孩子其實很聰明。
我在醫院曾經看到一個從台大醫科畢業的孩子，我花了很長的時間跟他接觸，他只要看到穿白袍的人走近，就會狠狠的瞪著對方，有時甚至會無預警的搥對方，所以所有的醫護人員都很怕他。我大概花了三個月的時間才可以跟他坐下來慢慢談，大概半年後他才能意識到我對他的關心。我常常利用下班時間去陪他下五子棋，也就是從這兒開始，讓我覺得很難過。我常在想：「一個這麼聰明的孩子，為什麼現在只能跟我坐在這兒下五子棋？」於是，我開始追尋他生命的歷程。
我從他身上發現兩個秘密：第一個令我驚訝的是──他從小學到高中從來沒有考過第二名。這讓我想到了金庸筆下的一個人──東方不敗，這時我才領悟到原來東方不敗指的就是一敗塗地。有人是東方不敗，但是只要一敗就會塗地，所以由中抽離出一個很重要的物質就叫做成功。有人十幾歲就成功，有人中年成功，也有人老年才成功，但是太早成功所代表的就是壓力重重。
孩子在成長的過程裡頭並不是靠第一名長大的，他要的是學習動機，學習動機及學習歷程比學習結果重要，但是我們現在往往只在乎結果，不重視歷程，這樣一來，對孩子而言就是壓力。我們期望孩子成績好，永遠名列前茅，而孩子就會想辦法保持第一，壓力因此而來。在心理學來講這就是「高期望」，但! 是! 「高期望」＝「高壓力」。沒有一個人能夠永遠得第一，有一個專家勞瑞爾曾說：「我是物理學專家，所謂的『專家』就是在我的領域裡我會，其它的領域我就叫白痴。」但是現在我們要求我們的孩子全會，全會也就代表了全不會。所以一個人要演活自己，何謂演活自己？就是一個人演一個自己才能全心全意的演好自己，如果一個人分兩顆心，就叫做半心半意，一個人要學三樣好，就叫三心兩意，一個人要多才多藝、四項全能就叫做分明找死。因 為一個人不可能什麼都會，如果什麼都會就不叫「專家」。
從這個孩子身上我又想到金庸筆下的另外一個人，叫做獨孤求敗，獨孤倒過來就叫做孤獨，獨孤求敗好孤獨，這意謂著人在高處不勝寒。我們看到我們的孩子成績很好，考試第一名，但是我們忘記了孩子他好孤獨、好寒冷，也忘了他有壓力。所以我們一直以為孩子成績好應該很有自信，但是由研究中我們發現：成績好的孩子大多沒有自信，成績差的孩子大多數很自卑。
以前有部連續劇叫保鑣，裡面有個人物我非常喜歡，叫做賈糊塗，我喜歡他那種難得塗糊的個性，所有不能解決的問題，最後都是賈糊塗解決。我們在老子裡頭有看到一句話：大智若愚。有的時候有些人看起來笨笨的，學習笨笨的，走的笨笨的，其實是最聰明的。有很多人都是這樣子，例如非洲之父史懷哲，他是一個醫生，他的成長過程並不順遂，他大學沒考上，後來因為他手風琴拉得很好，所以進了大學唸歷史系，他大學畢業後，三十歲才開始念醫科，卅八歲醫科畢業，人生過半的史懷哲畢業之後到了非洲創造了一個不朽的基業，成為非洲之父─慈悲的代言人。
另外一位，印度的勝雄叫甘地，甘地是印度的國父，但是他在四十歲之前是紈跨子弟，他一直以為自己是英國人，穿著很英國、打扮很英國，直到有人告訴他，他是印度? 四十歲他的夢才幻滅。他四十歲的時候帶領著印度做和平的革命，創造了不朽的勝雄甘地。
還有一位我們更熟悉的人叫做 劉其偉，他今年九十二歲過逝，卅八歲才學畫，畫了廿八年，在六十六歲時才成名，活了九十二歲，但是他畫出了畫壇奇葩。
諾貝爾物理學獎的得主，有一位是日本人叫小才昌俊，他研究微粒子。他念書時的成績是慘得不能看，但他在得獎時說過一句話：「成績單不是人生的保證，我就是例子。」
我花很多時間在做研究、做實驗，所以我不可能背很多東西，「背」跟「思考」、「想像」、「創意」是有差別的，我們現在的教育就是背得多分數就高，但是你可有想過，有位禪師講過一句話：「這一分鐘你找到美好，這一分鐘你就不會找到不美好」。而我的理解是：「這一分鐘你拿書來背，這一分鐘你就不會思考、不會想像、不會創意。」因為它同時進行，但是未來的世界是送給會想的人，不是送給會背的人。
1965年的諾貝爾物理學獎得主叫費曼，他曾說過他爸爸送給他三個能力：會思考、會想像、有創意。從他爸爸的教育中他才知道，一個問題可以有很多個答案。宇宙是無限大，而地球在宇宙中並不是唯一，我們的孩子也許可以贏得全台灣、全亞洲，甚至全世界，但是他在宇宙中還是渺小的。
很多事情以前是對的，現在卻是錯的。例如：飛機在以前不會飛是對的，現在卻是錯的。所以，我們的腦袋如果只是死記，我想孩子未來有的只是壓力，未來學歷並不難拿到，而未來徵才要的是會工作的孩子，不是會讀書的孩子。因此，我們要培養的是孩子的能力。未來有些東西? 例如：志氣要高、勇氣要足、骨氣要硬，我想這是一個孩子應該要俱備的。而這些是我在這個台大醫科的孩子身上所發現的。
另外一個秘密，就是他告訴我：「如果我學音樂，我現在會是一個快樂的音樂家。」換言之：如果他學音樂，他就不會住在精神病院，如果他沒有住在精神病院，他就會有人生。還有另外一個個案，原本應是孩子住進來，最後卻是媽媽住進來。
一個孩子他的求學過程很辛苦也很順利，因為他媽媽對他的期望很高，而他也很順遂的考上托福出國留學，在他畢業拿到學位的當天，寫了封信寄回台灣給媽媽，之後便跳河自殺死亡。信中有句話非常刺痛人心，他說：「媽媽，妳的夢，我幫妳圓了，請妳放我一馬。」媽媽看完信之後受不了，住進了精神病院。
我們千萬不要忘了，每個孩子都有適合他的位置，所謂天生我才必有用。心理學家早已提出多元智慧的理論，意思是說，每個孩子都有自己的舞台，都有一套不同的智慧結構，有些人長於音樂，有些人長於科學，有些人長於運動，會音樂的人學不成科學；會科學的孩子藝術並非頂尖；我們不要老想把孩子當做科學家來養，重要的是找出孩子擅長與眾不同的智慧。我們一定要記住一件事情：行行有狀元，而且未來一定是每一行每一業都有狀元。當然在學習、成長的過程中，孩子必? 跌跌撞撞，所以，我們要教孩子：這一條路走不通可以走另一條路，不要因一時的跌倒而失志，人生是可以轉個彎的，柳暗花明又一村，人生是可以失之東隅，收之桑榆。
你是否記得當你的孩子小時候哭鬧時，你敏銳的聽聲音便能知道他是尿床還是肚子餓。我發現在孩子六歲以前，每一個爸爸媽媽都像心理醫生，為什麼孩子長大以後，你就不像了呢？你以為孩子長大了嗎？還是你敏銳的特質不見了？還是有些東西去阻礙了你敏銳的特質？或者是你不夠用心呢？其實這些因素都包括，但是我認為不夠用心是最重要的。
心理學家皮亞傑曾說：「請你記住，孩子的名字永遠叫『小孩』。」縱使是資優，他還是小孩。專制成性的中國父母最不會利用同理心了解孩子心裡想什麼，我們以為孩子自己生的，應該了解的；其實不然，孩子在每個年紀都有一些不一樣的成長使命，三歲的孩子與十一歲的孩子絕對不一樣，孩子需要我們做父母的用心去了解。何謂了解？就是三歲時就把他當做三歲的孩子來看，五歲時就當做五歲來看，十歲時就當做十歲的孩子來看，這才是了解。
一個孩子的學習需要動機，動機是成就的原動力。例如：閱讀是一種動機，假若閱讀不是一種動機的時候，閱讀就是一種考試，如果閱讀是一種考試，那麼閱讀不會持久，也就不會有成就。因為人生是一輩子的事，閱讀也是一輩子的事，假如你唸完書就不再閱讀，那麼你就會變成草包。而做學問不是死記東西，是要知道它在哪裡。所以爸爸媽媽們對面孩子的詢問時，可以常常用「我不知道，我們一起來查書」來回答。「我不知道」表示人有進! 步! 的空間，如果全知道，就是全不知道，假若一個五歲的孩子全都知道，那就完了，表示他已經滿了。有的時候我們會覺得孩子在這個年紀不夠飽滿、不夠豐富，但是換一個角度來看，也正因為他不夠，表示他正等待吸收很多東西。所以滿分哲學到底是對或錯？一個每一次都考滿分的孩子，對他而言已經足夠了，因為他沒有再進步的空間，也不能夠退步，那麼下一次的考試該怎麼辦呢？這時他的壓力就來嘍！所以我們應該要讓孩子有進步的空間，即使退步了，我們也要給孩子鼓勵使他有唸書的動力。
孩子專心的時間會因興趣而有變化，例如對數學有興趣的孩子，他的專心時間就會加長。若孩子常常忘東忘西並不表示他不夠聰明，因為在十歲以前的孩子腦袋裡頭只能專心做一件事情，但是我們可以想別的方法加強孩子對事情的專注，使他不容易忘記。例如：下雨天時，我們可以將雨傘掛在電梯門口，提醒孩子不要忘記帶雨傘。教育是可以用很多種不同的方法，! 如! 果一種方法行不通，我們可以用二種、三種，甚至更多種，盡量少責備、多了解。
在做教育之前，我們要學會一件事：會愛自己的人才會愛別人。人生有四個要件，而這四個要件是做教育的準備：健康、快樂、時間、美好生活，若再加上一點金錢，就叫做富有的人。如果一個人只是努力工作、努力賺錢，然後逼著孩子好好讀書未來努力工作、賺錢，那麼這就叫做有錢人。
人生裡頭有二件事情是很重要的：一是努力得到我們想要的；二是享受我們得到的更為重要。我們常常盲目的生活、工作、賺錢，而賺錢的目的不就是要讓自己的生活更美好嗎？但是大多數的人卻不知道要享受我們得到的。
我認為人生過四十之後一定要有兩個圓在交集，一個圓是「精神」、另一個圓是「物質」。四十歲之前我們可能為了過更好的生活而每天工作、賺錢，假設人的一生能活八十歲，四十歲已是過半了，所以四十歲之後，我們不能永遠只想到工作而忽略了生活中的美好。要擁有美好的生活，最重要的就是要有健康，身體健康是心理健康之母，心理健康是家庭健康之母。沒有健康，教育便是虛假，所以有健康的身體才會有好心情，有好心情就不會對孩子亂發脾氣，也就能夠有耐心聽聽孩子說的話，相對的親子關係就會更融洽，家庭氣氛會更和諧。
另一個重要的要件便是快樂。現代的孩子普遍都不快樂，因為功課太多、壓力太大，所以如果孩子有機會開懷暢笑時，我們不要去嚇阻他，要尊重孩子的快樂。研究指出：快樂的人比不快樂的人學習效率多了1.76倍，假若我們的孩子是快樂的，那麼他的學習≠壓力、學習≠高期望。我們甚至可以花點心思製造快樂，例如：每天找個時間全家坐在一起說說笑話。當孩子說笑話給我們聽時，即便不好笑，我們也要笑得很開心，孩子會說得更多，並且從中得到自信與快樂。
童年，對我們來說已經是很遙遠的事，有些人甚至沒有美好的童年回憶，但我們別忘了，現在正是孩子的童年，我們有機會再過一次童年，陪著孩子一同成長、一同過童年。所以，我們要學習拒絕忙碌，錢是永遠賺不完的，事情是永遠做不完的，而孩子的童年卻只有一個，撥出一些時間陪陪孩子、了解孩子，親子關係才會建立，互動會更好。
Forwarded by Caca, a very good article for understand our child, and telling us the value of life!
I decided to go back home 1 hour earlier every day!
Feverip
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Prayers at the Opening session of Senate
Thought you might enjoy this interesting prayer given in Kansas at the opening session of their Senate.
It seems prayer still upsets some people.. When Minister Joe Wright was asked to open the new session of the Kansas Senate, everyone was expecting the usual generalities, but this is what they heard:
Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask your forgiveness and to seek your direction and guidance.
We know Your Word says, 'Woe to those who call evil good,' but that is exactly what we have done.
We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed our values.
We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery.
We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare.
We have killed our unborn and called it choice.
We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable.
We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building self esteem..
We have abused power and called it politics.
We have coveted our neighbor's possessions and called it ambition.
We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called it freedom of expression.
We have ridiculed the time-honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment.
Search us, Oh, God, and know our hearts today; cleanse us from every sin and set us free. Amen!
The response was immediate. A number of legislators walked out during the prayer in protest.
In 6 short weeks, Central Christian Church, where Rev. Wright is pastor, logged more than 5,000 phone calls with only 47 of those calls responding negatively. The church is now receiving international requests for copies of this prayer from India , Africa and Korea.
Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer on his radio program, 'The Rest of the Story, and receive d a larger response to this program than any other he has ever aired.
With the Lord's help, may this prayer sweep over our nation and wholeheartedly become our desire so that we again can be called 'one nation under God.'
Nowadays , there are a lot twisted saying about what the older people we used to believe to be right and what to be wrong! What we appreacite a good man is not his heart, but his money..
We appreaciate a lady by her beauty and appearance only, does not matter she is well been edcuated at all or she is having that kind of complaisance.
Young model can be a hit once if she is pretty, long queue at the book show for model's photo album, but no one seemed to be insterested in some kind of books that is created for teachign us what good or bad is... The world is becoming skin deep, most of the people judges people by their suit but not their speech!
feverip
We Only Live Once!
No point earning so much money you cannot live to spend it.
No point using limited life to chase unlimited money, the heaven does not accept such kind of cash!
Money is not yours until you spend it.
Where is not enough time for life, but a lot of money waiting, where do you choose to go?
When you are young, you use your health to exchange your money; when you are getting old, you use your money to buy back your health. Difference is that, it is too late!
How happy a man is, is not how much he has but how little he needs
No point working so hard to provide for the people you have no time to spend with.
Don’t confuse with wealthy and richness, everyone can be rich but only a few is classified wealthy.
So the Moral of today:
Do not force yourself to do things impossible!
Relax and be a healthy man
There are Three Staff gone Dead in less than Two Months, is this one episode of life!...or...
A sign of warning to those 1,000 staff in the building who are still alive!?
So, go back home and play wiht your kids, kiss you wife whenever you can, say "I love You! " Loud to your mother and Father...
Bring them for Dim Sum Sunday Morning.... celebrate the important event with them...with good food yon can afford today!
Don't be stingy, as one day, we may have no one to share the joy, laughters of life with you...
feverip
No point using limited life to chase unlimited money, the heaven does not accept such kind of cash!
Money is not yours until you spend it.
Where is not enough time for life, but a lot of money waiting, where do you choose to go?
When you are young, you use your health to exchange your money; when you are getting old, you use your money to buy back your health. Difference is that, it is too late!
How happy a man is, is not how much he has but how little he needs
No point working so hard to provide for the people you have no time to spend with.
Don’t confuse with wealthy and richness, everyone can be rich but only a few is classified wealthy.
So the Moral of today:
Do not force yourself to do things impossible!
Relax and be a healthy man
There are Three Staff gone Dead in less than Two Months, is this one episode of life!...or...
A sign of warning to those 1,000 staff in the building who are still alive!?
So, go back home and play wiht your kids, kiss you wife whenever you can, say "I love You! " Loud to your mother and Father...
Bring them for Dim Sum Sunday Morning.... celebrate the important event with them...with good food yon can afford today!
Don't be stingy, as one day, we may have no one to share the joy, laughters of life with you...
feverip
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Difficult season
There are four seasons, like the life we are, having some difficult times like the cold winter. But when the problem is solved, there will come the Spring!
So Do not judge one person by one difficult season!
feverip
PS
Thanks for Carol for the pictures.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Irreplaceable
A story worth sharing 4 years ago, an accident took my beloved away and very often I wonder, how does my wife, who is now in the heavenly realm, feel right now? She must be feeling extremely sad for leaving a husband who is incapable to taking care of the house and the kid.
B'cos that is the exact feeling that I have, as I feel that I have failed to provide for the physical and emotional needs of my child, and failed to be the dad and mum for my child.
There was one particular day, when I had an emergency at work. Hence, I had to leave home whilst my child was still sleeping. So thinking that there was still rice leftovers, I hastily cooked an egg and left after informing my sleepy child.With the double roles, I am often exhausted at work as well as when I am home.
So after a long day, I came home, totally drained of all energy. So with just a brief hug and kiss for my child, I went straight into the room, skipping dinner. However, when I jumped into my bed with intention of just having a well-deserved sleep, all i heard and felt was broken porcelain and warm liquid! I flipped open my blanket, and there lies the source of the 'problem'... a broken bowl with instant noodles and a mess on the bedsheet and blanket!Boy, was I mad! I was so furious that I took a clothes hanger, charged straight at my child who was happily playing with his toy, and give him a good spanking!
He merely cried but not asking for mercy, except a short explanation:"Dad, I was hungry and there wasn't anymore leftover rice. But you were not back yet, hence I wanted to cook some instant noodles. But I remembered you reminding me not to touch or use the gas stove without any adults around, hence I turned on the shower and used the hot water from the bathroom to cook the noodles. One is for you and the other is for me. However, I was afraid that the noodles will turn cold, so I hid it under the blanket to keep it warm till you return. But I forgot to remind you 'cos I was playing with my toys...I am sorry Dad..."
At that moment, tears were starting to run down my cheeks...but I didn't want my son to see his dad crying so I dashed into the bathroom and cried with the shower head on to mask my cries. After that episode, I went towards my son to give him a tight hug and applied medication on him, while coaxing him to sleep. Then, it was time to clear up the mess on the bed. When everything was done and well past midnight, I passed my son's room, and saw that he was still crying, not from the pain on his little buttock, but from looking at the photograph of his beloved mummy.
A year has passed since the episode, I have tried, in this period, to focus on giving him both the love of his dad and mum, and to attend to most of his needs. And soon, he is turning seven, and will be graduating from kindergarten. Fortunately, the incident did not leave a lasting impression on his childhood memories and he is still happily growing up.
However, not so long ago, I hit my boy again, with much regret. This time, his kindergarten teacher called, informing me of my son's absence from school. I took off early from work and went home, expecting him to explain. But he wasn't to be found, so I went around our house, calling out his name and eventually found him outside a stationery shop, happily playing computer games. I was fuming, brought him home and whack the hell out of him. He did not retaliate, except to say, 'I am sorry, Dad'. But after much probing, I realized that it was a 'Talent Show' organized by his school and the invite is for every student's mummy. And that was the reason for his absence as he has no mummy..
Few days after the caning, my son came home to tell me, the kindergarten has recently taught him how to read and write. Since then, he has kept to himself and stayed in his room to practise his writing, which I am sure, would make my wife proud, if she was still around. 'cos he makes me proud too!Time passes by very quickly, and soon another year has passed. It's winter, and its Christmas time. Everywhere the christmas spirit is in every passer-by...Christmas carols and frantic shoppers....but alas, my son got into another trouble. When I was about to knock off from the day's work, the post office called. Due to the peak season, the post master was also on an edgy mood. He called to tell me that my son has attempted to post several letters with no addressee.
Although I did make a promise never to hit my son again, I couldn't help but to hit him as I feel that this child of mine is really beyond control. Once again, as before, he apologized, ' I'm sorry, Dad' and no additional reason to explain. I pushed him towards a corner, went to the post office to collect the letters with no addressee and came home, and angrily questioned my son on his prank, during this time of the year.His answer, amidst his sobbing, was : The letters were for Mummy.
My eyes grew teary, but I tried to control my emotions and continued to ask him: " But why did you post so many letters, at one time?" My son's reply was: " I have been writing to mummy for a long time, but each time I reach out for the post box, it was too high for me, hence I was not able to post the letters. But recently, when I went back to the postbox, I could reach it and I sent it all at once...
"After hearing this, I was lost. Lost at not knowing what to do, what to say....I told my son, " Son, mummy is in the heavenly kingdom, so in future, if you have anything to tell her, just burn the letter and it will reach mummy. My son, on hearing this, was much pacified and calm, and soon after, he was sleeping soundly.
On promising that I will burn the letters on his behalf, I brought the letters outside, but couldnt help opening the letter before they turn to ash. And one of the letters broke my heart....
"Dear Mummy,I miss you so much! Today, there was a 'Talent Show' in school, and the school invited all mothers for the show. But you are not around, so I did not want to participate as well. I did not tell Dad about it as I was afraid that Dad would start to cry and miss you all over again. Dad went around looking for me, but in order to hide my sadness, I sat in front of the computer and started playing games at one of the shops. Dad was furious, and he couldnt help it but scolded and hit me, but I did not tell him the real reason.
Mummy, everyday I see Dad missing you and whenever he think of you, he is so sad and often hide and cry in his room. I think we both miss you very very much. Too much for our own good I think. But Mummy, I am starting to forget your face. Can you please appear in my dreams so that I can see your face and remember you? I heard that if you fall asleep with the photograph of the person whom you miss, you will see the person in your dreams. But mummy, why havent you appear?"After reading the letter, I cant stop sobbing. 'cos I can never replace the irreplaceable gap left behind by my wife....
************
For the females with children:
Don't do so much overtime. If you cannot finish the work, it must be some kind of problems within the company, and it is not your sole problem. Feedback to your boss. Endless overtime may not necessary be the answer to the problem. Take care of your health so that you can treasure and take care of your little precious.
For the married men:
Drink less, smoke less, b'cos nothing can replace your good health, not even business nor clients.Try thinking this way, are you able to work till your clients are totally dependent on you? or your boss is totally dependent on you? In this society, no one is indispensable.Take care of your health, so that you can take care of your little precious and your loved ones.
^^^^^^
It was forwarded from a Friend, don't know who the author.., It is a very touching article!
Feverip
B'cos that is the exact feeling that I have, as I feel that I have failed to provide for the physical and emotional needs of my child, and failed to be the dad and mum for my child.
There was one particular day, when I had an emergency at work. Hence, I had to leave home whilst my child was still sleeping. So thinking that there was still rice leftovers, I hastily cooked an egg and left after informing my sleepy child.With the double roles, I am often exhausted at work as well as when I am home.
So after a long day, I came home, totally drained of all energy. So with just a brief hug and kiss for my child, I went straight into the room, skipping dinner. However, when I jumped into my bed with intention of just having a well-deserved sleep, all i heard and felt was broken porcelain and warm liquid! I flipped open my blanket, and there lies the source of the 'problem'... a broken bowl with instant noodles and a mess on the bedsheet and blanket!Boy, was I mad! I was so furious that I took a clothes hanger, charged straight at my child who was happily playing with his toy, and give him a good spanking!
He merely cried but not asking for mercy, except a short explanation:"Dad, I was hungry and there wasn't anymore leftover rice. But you were not back yet, hence I wanted to cook some instant noodles. But I remembered you reminding me not to touch or use the gas stove without any adults around, hence I turned on the shower and used the hot water from the bathroom to cook the noodles. One is for you and the other is for me. However, I was afraid that the noodles will turn cold, so I hid it under the blanket to keep it warm till you return. But I forgot to remind you 'cos I was playing with my toys...I am sorry Dad..."
At that moment, tears were starting to run down my cheeks...but I didn't want my son to see his dad crying so I dashed into the bathroom and cried with the shower head on to mask my cries. After that episode, I went towards my son to give him a tight hug and applied medication on him, while coaxing him to sleep. Then, it was time to clear up the mess on the bed. When everything was done and well past midnight, I passed my son's room, and saw that he was still crying, not from the pain on his little buttock, but from looking at the photograph of his beloved mummy.
A year has passed since the episode, I have tried, in this period, to focus on giving him both the love of his dad and mum, and to attend to most of his needs. And soon, he is turning seven, and will be graduating from kindergarten. Fortunately, the incident did not leave a lasting impression on his childhood memories and he is still happily growing up.
However, not so long ago, I hit my boy again, with much regret. This time, his kindergarten teacher called, informing me of my son's absence from school. I took off early from work and went home, expecting him to explain. But he wasn't to be found, so I went around our house, calling out his name and eventually found him outside a stationery shop, happily playing computer games. I was fuming, brought him home and whack the hell out of him. He did not retaliate, except to say, 'I am sorry, Dad'. But after much probing, I realized that it was a 'Talent Show' organized by his school and the invite is for every student's mummy. And that was the reason for his absence as he has no mummy..
Few days after the caning, my son came home to tell me, the kindergarten has recently taught him how to read and write. Since then, he has kept to himself and stayed in his room to practise his writing, which I am sure, would make my wife proud, if she was still around. 'cos he makes me proud too!Time passes by very quickly, and soon another year has passed. It's winter, and its Christmas time. Everywhere the christmas spirit is in every passer-by...Christmas carols and frantic shoppers....but alas, my son got into another trouble. When I was about to knock off from the day's work, the post office called. Due to the peak season, the post master was also on an edgy mood. He called to tell me that my son has attempted to post several letters with no addressee.
Although I did make a promise never to hit my son again, I couldn't help but to hit him as I feel that this child of mine is really beyond control. Once again, as before, he apologized, ' I'm sorry, Dad' and no additional reason to explain. I pushed him towards a corner, went to the post office to collect the letters with no addressee and came home, and angrily questioned my son on his prank, during this time of the year.His answer, amidst his sobbing, was : The letters were for Mummy.
My eyes grew teary, but I tried to control my emotions and continued to ask him: " But why did you post so many letters, at one time?" My son's reply was: " I have been writing to mummy for a long time, but each time I reach out for the post box, it was too high for me, hence I was not able to post the letters. But recently, when I went back to the postbox, I could reach it and I sent it all at once...
"After hearing this, I was lost. Lost at not knowing what to do, what to say....I told my son, " Son, mummy is in the heavenly kingdom, so in future, if you have anything to tell her, just burn the letter and it will reach mummy. My son, on hearing this, was much pacified and calm, and soon after, he was sleeping soundly.
On promising that I will burn the letters on his behalf, I brought the letters outside, but couldnt help opening the letter before they turn to ash. And one of the letters broke my heart....
"Dear Mummy,I miss you so much! Today, there was a 'Talent Show' in school, and the school invited all mothers for the show. But you are not around, so I did not want to participate as well. I did not tell Dad about it as I was afraid that Dad would start to cry and miss you all over again. Dad went around looking for me, but in order to hide my sadness, I sat in front of the computer and started playing games at one of the shops. Dad was furious, and he couldnt help it but scolded and hit me, but I did not tell him the real reason.
Mummy, everyday I see Dad missing you and whenever he think of you, he is so sad and often hide and cry in his room. I think we both miss you very very much. Too much for our own good I think. But Mummy, I am starting to forget your face. Can you please appear in my dreams so that I can see your face and remember you? I heard that if you fall asleep with the photograph of the person whom you miss, you will see the person in your dreams. But mummy, why havent you appear?"After reading the letter, I cant stop sobbing. 'cos I can never replace the irreplaceable gap left behind by my wife....
************
For the females with children:
Don't do so much overtime. If you cannot finish the work, it must be some kind of problems within the company, and it is not your sole problem. Feedback to your boss. Endless overtime may not necessary be the answer to the problem. Take care of your health so that you can treasure and take care of your little precious.
For the married men:
Drink less, smoke less, b'cos nothing can replace your good health, not even business nor clients.Try thinking this way, are you able to work till your clients are totally dependent on you? or your boss is totally dependent on you? In this society, no one is indispensable.Take care of your health, so that you can take care of your little precious and your loved ones.
^^^^^^
It was forwarded from a Friend, don't know who the author.., It is a very touching article!
Feverip
Like Father Like Son
The father 86 old and he had given most of his retirement fund to his son to pay for the mortgage and he left almost nothing for his living.
He had been having dementia for a few years. He could not eat properly and caused the dinning table a mess every time after his meal. His son’s wife was shouting loud and made complaints whenever she cleaned the table!
Sooner his son tried to put him at the corner of the dinning room, give him all kinds of disposable paper cups and plates such that his wife would not talk much about it.
The old pa took it not say anything as he is old and he has to rely on his son income to support him for a living, That is already very good not kicking him away at the street like some of the morons are doing in Hong Kong…
One day Old man’s grandson said told his parents the shop at the concern of the street he used to buy that kind of disposable cup and plate was closed, probably he had to buy a lot at better discount as from the whole seller.
His father felt strange and said, “Why? Son, Your Grandpa is very old already and he might not be able to live long, there is no need to buy so many at all!”
His Son said to their parent though grand father was old and it was more advisable to buy in preparation as one day his Father and Mother would one day in need this disposable stuffs…..
********************
The moral of this story is, how do you treat your father, will be expecting the same you child treating you sooner!
I do hope my daughters and son will not treat me this way!!
He had been having dementia for a few years. He could not eat properly and caused the dinning table a mess every time after his meal. His son’s wife was shouting loud and made complaints whenever she cleaned the table!
Sooner his son tried to put him at the corner of the dinning room, give him all kinds of disposable paper cups and plates such that his wife would not talk much about it.
The old pa took it not say anything as he is old and he has to rely on his son income to support him for a living, That is already very good not kicking him away at the street like some of the morons are doing in Hong Kong…
One day Old man’s grandson said told his parents the shop at the concern of the street he used to buy that kind of disposable cup and plate was closed, probably he had to buy a lot at better discount as from the whole seller.
His father felt strange and said, “Why? Son, Your Grandpa is very old already and he might not be able to live long, there is no need to buy so many at all!”
His Son said to their parent though grand father was old and it was more advisable to buy in preparation as one day his Father and Mother would one day in need this disposable stuffs…..
********************
The moral of this story is, how do you treat your father, will be expecting the same you child treating you sooner!
I do hope my daughters and son will not treat me this way!!
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Food medicine
HEADACHE? EAT FISH! Eat plenty of fish -- fish oil helps prevent headaches.
So does ginger, which reduces inflammation and pain.
HAY FEVER? EAT YOGURT! Eat a lots of yogurt before pollen season.
Also-eat honey from your area (local region) daily.
TO PREVENT STROKE DRINK TEA! Tea Prevents build-up of fatty deposits on artery walls with regular doses of tea. (actually, tea suppresses appetite and keeps the pounds from invading....Green tea is great for our immune system)!
INSOMNIA (CAN'T SLEEP?) HONEY! Use honey as a tranquilizer and sedative.
ASTHMA? EAT ONIONS!!!! Eating onions helps ease constriction of bronchial tubes. (onion packs place on chest helped the respiratory ailments and actually made breathing better).
ARTHRITIS? EAT FISH, TOO! Salmon, tuna, mackerel and sardines actually prevent arthritis. (fish has omega oils, good for our immune system)
UPSET STOMACH? BANANAS - GINGER! Bananas will settle an upset stomach. Ginger will cure morning sickness and nausea.
BLADDER INFECTION? DRINK CRANBERRY JUICE! High-acid cranberry juice controls harmful bacteria.
BONE PROBLEMS? EAT PINEAPPLE!!! Bone fractures and osteoporosis can be prevented by the manganese in pineapple.
MEMORY PROBLEMS? EAT OYSTERS! Oysters help improve your mental functioning by supplying much-needed zinc.
COLDS? EAT GARLIC! Clear up that stuffy head with garlic. (remember, garlic lowers cholesterol, too.)
COUGHING? USE RED PEPPERS! A substance similar to that found in the cough syrups is found in hot red pepper. Use red (cayenne) pepper with caution-it can irritate your tummy.
BREAST CANCER? EAT Wheat, bran and cabbage Helps to maintain estrogen at healthy levels.
LUNG CANCER? EAT DARK GREEN AND ORANGE AND VEGGIES! A good antidote is beta carotene, a form of Vitamin A found in dark green and orange vegetables..
ULCERS? EAT CABBAGE ALSO! Cabbage contains chemicals that help heal both gastric and duodenal ulcers.
DIARRHEA? EAT APPLES! Grate an apple with its skin, let it turn brown and eat it to cure this condition. (Bananas are good for this ailment)
CLOGGED ARTERIES? EAT AVOCADO! Mono unsaturated fat in avocados lowers cholesterol.
HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE? EAT CELERY AND OLIVE OIL!!! Olive oil has been shown to lower blood pressure. Celery contains a chemical that lowers pressure too.
BLOOD SUGAR IMBALANCE? EAT BROCCOLI AND PEANUTS!!! The chromium in broccoli and peanuts helps regulate insulin and blood sugar.
Kiwi: Tiny but mighty. This is a good source of potassium, magnesium, Vitamin E & fibre. It's Vitamin C content is twice that of an orange.
Apple: An apple a day keeps the doctor away? Although an apple has a low Vitamin C content, it has antioxidants & flavonoids which enhances the activity of Vitamin C thereby helping to lower the risks of colon cancer, heart attack & stroke..
Strawberry: Protective fruit. Strawberries have the sp;highest total antioxidant power among major fruits & protects the body from cancer causing, blood vessels clogging free radicals. (Actually, any berry is good for you..they're high in anti-oxidants and they actually keep us young..........blueberries are the best and very versatile in the health field........they get rid of all the free-radicals that invade our bodies)
Orange : Sweetest medicine. Taking 2 - 4 oranges a day may help keep colds away, lower cholesterol, prevent & dissolve kidney stones as well as lessen the risk of colon cancer.
Watermelon: Coolest Thirst Quencher. Composed of 92% water, it is also packed with a giant dose of glutathione which helps boost our immune system.. They are also a key source of lycopene - the cancer fighting oxidant. Other nutrients Found in watermelon are Vitamin C & Potassium. (watermelon also has natural substances [natural SPF sources] that keep our skin healthy, protecting our skin from those darn UV rays)
Guava & Papaya: Top awards for Vitamin C. They are the clear winners for their high Vitamin C content. Guava is also rich in fibre which helps prevent constipation. Papaya is rich in carotene, this is good for your eyes. (also good for gas and indigestion)
Tomatoes are very good as a preventative measure for men, keeps those prostrate problems from invading their bodies......GOOD as MEDICINE.
So does ginger, which reduces inflammation and pain.
HAY FEVER? EAT YOGURT! Eat a lots of yogurt before pollen season.
Also-eat honey from your area (local region) daily.
TO PREVENT STROKE DRINK TEA! Tea Prevents build-up of fatty deposits on artery walls with regular doses of tea. (actually, tea suppresses appetite and keeps the pounds from invading....Green tea is great for our immune system)!
INSOMNIA (CAN'T SLEEP?) HONEY! Use honey as a tranquilizer and sedative.
ASTHMA? EAT ONIONS!!!! Eating onions helps ease constriction of bronchial tubes. (onion packs place on chest helped the respiratory ailments and actually made breathing better).
ARTHRITIS? EAT FISH, TOO! Salmon, tuna, mackerel and sardines actually prevent arthritis. (fish has omega oils, good for our immune system)
UPSET STOMACH? BANANAS - GINGER! Bananas will settle an upset stomach. Ginger will cure morning sickness and nausea.
BLADDER INFECTION? DRINK CRANBERRY JUICE! High-acid cranberry juice controls harmful bacteria.
BONE PROBLEMS? EAT PINEAPPLE!!! Bone fractures and osteoporosis can be prevented by the manganese in pineapple.
MEMORY PROBLEMS? EAT OYSTERS! Oysters help improve your mental functioning by supplying much-needed zinc.
COLDS? EAT GARLIC! Clear up that stuffy head with garlic. (remember, garlic lowers cholesterol, too.)
COUGHING? USE RED PEPPERS! A substance similar to that found in the cough syrups is found in hot red pepper. Use red (cayenne) pepper with caution-it can irritate your tummy.
BREAST CANCER? EAT Wheat, bran and cabbage Helps to maintain estrogen at healthy levels.
LUNG CANCER? EAT DARK GREEN AND ORANGE AND VEGGIES! A good antidote is beta carotene, a form of Vitamin A found in dark green and orange vegetables..
ULCERS? EAT CABBAGE ALSO! Cabbage contains chemicals that help heal both gastric and duodenal ulcers.
DIARRHEA? EAT APPLES! Grate an apple with its skin, let it turn brown and eat it to cure this condition. (Bananas are good for this ailment)
CLOGGED ARTERIES? EAT AVOCADO! Mono unsaturated fat in avocados lowers cholesterol.
HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE? EAT CELERY AND OLIVE OIL!!! Olive oil has been shown to lower blood pressure. Celery contains a chemical that lowers pressure too.
BLOOD SUGAR IMBALANCE? EAT BROCCOLI AND PEANUTS!!! The chromium in broccoli and peanuts helps regulate insulin and blood sugar.
Kiwi: Tiny but mighty. This is a good source of potassium, magnesium, Vitamin E & fibre. It's Vitamin C content is twice that of an orange.
Apple: An apple a day keeps the doctor away? Although an apple has a low Vitamin C content, it has antioxidants & flavonoids which enhances the activity of Vitamin C thereby helping to lower the risks of colon cancer, heart attack & stroke..
Strawberry: Protective fruit. Strawberries have the sp;highest total antioxidant power among major fruits & protects the body from cancer causing, blood vessels clogging free radicals. (Actually, any berry is good for you..they're high in anti-oxidants and they actually keep us young..........blueberries are the best and very versatile in the health field........they get rid of all the free-radicals that invade our bodies)
Orange : Sweetest medicine. Taking 2 - 4 oranges a day may help keep colds away, lower cholesterol, prevent & dissolve kidney stones as well as lessen the risk of colon cancer.
Watermelon: Coolest Thirst Quencher. Composed of 92% water, it is also packed with a giant dose of glutathione which helps boost our immune system.. They are also a key source of lycopene - the cancer fighting oxidant. Other nutrients Found in watermelon are Vitamin C & Potassium. (watermelon also has natural substances [natural SPF sources] that keep our skin healthy, protecting our skin from those darn UV rays)
Guava & Papaya: Top awards for Vitamin C. They are the clear winners for their high Vitamin C content. Guava is also rich in fibre which helps prevent constipation. Papaya is rich in carotene, this is good for your eyes. (also good for gas and indigestion)
Tomatoes are very good as a preventative measure for men, keeps those prostrate problems from invading their bodies......GOOD as MEDICINE.
Fruit and Vegetable as a function for health
From the table , we can see waht are the goodness of the Fruit and vegetable.In cas eof constipation, what should we eat!? You can easily find out that we should eat beans and cabbage!
feverip
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Food Posioning
Taiwan, a woman suddenly died unexpectedly with signs of bleeding from her ears, nose, mouth & eyes. After a preliminary autopsy it was diagnosed death due to arsenic poisoning death.
Where did the arsenic come from? The police launched an in-depth and extensive investigation. A medical school professor was invited to come to solve the case. The professor carefully looked at the contents from the deceased's stomach, in less than half an hour, the mystery was solved. The professor said: 'The deceased did not commit suicide and neither was she murdered, she died of accidental death due to ignorance!'
Everyone was puzzled, why accidental death? The arsenic is of the U.S. military for carrying rice seedlings H Gao. The professor said: 'The arsenic is produced in the stomach of the deceased.' The deceased used to take 'Vitamin C' everyday, which in itself is not a problem. The problem was that she ate a large portion of shrimp/prawn during dinner. Eating shrimp/prawn is not the problem that's why nothing happened to her family ever though they took the same shrimp/prawn.
However at the same time the deceased also took 'vitamin C', that is where the problem is! Researchers at the University of Chicago in the United States, found through experiments, food such as soft-shell shrimp/prawn contains a much higher concentration of - five potassium arsenic compounds.
Such fresh food by itself has no toxic effects on the human body! However, in taking 'vitamin C', due to the chemical reaction, the original non-toxic - five potassium arsenic (As anhydride, also known as arsenic oxide, the chemical formula for As205) changed to a three potassium toxic arsenic (ADB arsenic anhydride), also known as arsenic trioxide, a chemical formula (As203), which is commonly known as arsenic to the public! Arsenic poisoning have magma role and can cause paralysis to the small blood vessels, "mercapto Jimei"??, inhibits the activity of the liver and fat necrosis change Hepatic Lobules Centre, heart, liver, kidney, intestine congestion, epithelial cell necrosis, telangiectasia. Therefore, a person who dies of arsenic poisoning will shows signs of bleeding from the ears, nose, mouth & eyes. Therefore; as a precautionary measure,
DO NOT take shrimp/prawn when taking 'vitamin C'.
Feverip
Where did the arsenic come from? The police launched an in-depth and extensive investigation. A medical school professor was invited to come to solve the case. The professor carefully looked at the contents from the deceased's stomach, in less than half an hour, the mystery was solved. The professor said: 'The deceased did not commit suicide and neither was she murdered, she died of accidental death due to ignorance!'
Everyone was puzzled, why accidental death? The arsenic is of the U.S. military for carrying rice seedlings H Gao. The professor said: 'The arsenic is produced in the stomach of the deceased.' The deceased used to take 'Vitamin C' everyday, which in itself is not a problem. The problem was that she ate a large portion of shrimp/prawn during dinner. Eating shrimp/prawn is not the problem that's why nothing happened to her family ever though they took the same shrimp/prawn.
However at the same time the deceased also took 'vitamin C', that is where the problem is! Researchers at the University of Chicago in the United States, found through experiments, food such as soft-shell shrimp/prawn contains a much higher concentration of - five potassium arsenic compounds.
Such fresh food by itself has no toxic effects on the human body! However, in taking 'vitamin C', due to the chemical reaction, the original non-toxic - five potassium arsenic (As anhydride, also known as arsenic oxide, the chemical formula for As205) changed to a three potassium toxic arsenic (ADB arsenic anhydride), also known as arsenic trioxide, a chemical formula (As203), which is commonly known as arsenic to the public! Arsenic poisoning have magma role and can cause paralysis to the small blood vessels, "mercapto Jimei"??, inhibits the activity of the liver and fat necrosis change Hepatic Lobules Centre, heart, liver, kidney, intestine congestion, epithelial cell necrosis, telangiectasia. Therefore, a person who dies of arsenic poisoning will shows signs of bleeding from the ears, nose, mouth & eyes. Therefore; as a precautionary measure,
DO NOT take shrimp/prawn when taking 'vitamin C'.
Feverip
暴斃之謎
台灣，一名女人突然無緣無故的七孔流血暴斃，一夜之間，就奔赴黃泉大家下回可 要 多多注意囉！經過初步驗屍 . 斷定為因砒霜中毒而死亡。那砒霜從何而來？ 警員展開了深入而廣泛的調 查。一名醫學院的教授被邀趕來協助破案。 教授仔細地察看了死者胃中取物，不到半個小時，暴斃之謎便 揭曉。教授 說：「死 者並非自殺，亦不是被殺，而是死於無知的『它殺』」！ 大家莫名其妙，何為『它殺』！？那砒霜又是從 韟茖荂 H 教授 說：「砒霜是在 死 者 腹 內 產生的。」
死者生前每天也會服食「維他命 」，這完全沒有問題！問題出在她 晚 餐吃了大量的蝦,吃蝦本身也是沒有問題的，所以她的家人吃了都沒有事，但死者卻同時服用了「維他命 C 」，問題就出在這裡 ! 這種物質食入體內，本身對人體並無毒害作用！但是，在服用「維生素 C 」之 後，由於化學作用，使原來無毒的－五鉀砷 (即砷酸酐，亦稱五氧化砷，其化學式為 As205) ，轉變為有毒的三鉀砷 ( 即亞砷 酸 酐 ) ，又稱為三氧化二砷，其化學式為 (As203) ，這就 是人們俗稱的砒霜 ! 砒霜有原漿毒作用，能麻痺細血管,抑制巰基梅的活性，並使肝臟脂變肝小葉中心壞死，心、肝、腎、腸充血，上皮細胞壞死，毛細血管擴張。故中其毒而死者，常是 七竅出血。
所以；為慎重起見，在服用「維生素 C 」期間，應當忌食蝦類。
feverip
死者生前每天也會服食「維他命 」，這完全沒有問題！問題出在她 晚 餐吃了大量的蝦,吃蝦本身也是沒有問題的，所以她的家人吃了都沒有事，但死者卻同時服用了「維他命 C 」，問題就出在這裡 ! 這種物質食入體內，本身對人體並無毒害作用！但是，在服用「維生素 C 」之 後，由於化學作用，使原來無毒的－五鉀砷 (即砷酸酐，亦稱五氧化砷，其化學式為 As205) ，轉變為有毒的三鉀砷 ( 即亞砷 酸 酐 ) ，又稱為三氧化二砷，其化學式為 (As203) ，這就 是人們俗稱的砒霜 ! 砒霜有原漿毒作用，能麻痺細血管,抑制巰基梅的活性，並使肝臟脂變肝小葉中心壞死，心、肝、腎、腸充血，上皮細胞壞死，毛細血管擴張。故中其毒而死者，常是 七竅出血。
所以；為慎重起見，在服用「維生素 C 」期間，應當忌食蝦類。
feverip
Help Others
There is too many stories of success, and too many sample of so called successful men been seen as celebrities in from of the publicity.
But how knows how much hard work they have been working and did they best they can make at the top of his peak in his career?
Imagine that you are the Vice President of the world largest consumer product group of business which has a capability of few Billions of dollar profit every year. And you work hard from eight to seven everyday and working at your tiny and crackberry for push mails after office hours! Imagine you had to talk to your beloved that sorry you had to leave for attend a phone conference during your vacation to Phuket or New Zealand?
When we you wife called you to the office asking when you could reach home for dinner, you were seem unable to meet the committed time to reach home afterwards! When you daughter shows you her examination result you could hardly hard to find 30 mins. of time for you to review with her result and give your comment on how she is studying. Sometimes you had hard time to memorize all the birthdays of your wife, mother, daughter and son. Do not mention anniversary of marriage.
On the other hand in front your handful good friends eye can show off our recent purchased Limited edition of Patek Philippe Complication watch or a skeleton Platinum Audemars Piguet perpetual calendar driven by a tiny and sophisticated Tourbillion? You had a pair of Rockport loudpskeakd weighed 250Kgf each, your new order Porsche twin turbo car?!
Well, is that an insignia of success? Is that the ultimate target that you would expect an appreciation from your friends, customer, supplier, friends and people you meet at restaurant and banks? Is that the kind of recognition when you select you car makers type instead of the function of it, is that you care more about where your house is situated more than the house itself as to tell which part of Hong Kong you are from?
No, I do not think so, as you know you should be aware that the God will one day testify you when you are at Top of Peak of your carrier, your successful in digging more fortune from your investment and your job?
A friend of mine is a VP of a world largest business player of consumer communication device. What I know him is that he got the supreme power to mobilize resources from one supplier to another, he is well paid at USD$300K a year, he is a man of knowledge, capability, management skill and charisma. Who knows that one day all theses will be taken away as their European headquarters closed the operations in USA! And at the same time his house was totally demolished by torando! But I think he should be glad that one thing he was blessed with his family, everyone in the family is untouched in the accident, they can start all over again. Who know one day he can be a CEO of a fortune 500 company, Who knows of he will be the mayor of the City?
All we have to do is to take a brake when we reach the top of peak in your career, try to figure out what if I would be CEO of a Company, what’s the next target? And what if I reach the new target then, what else I can do to make my fame, money and power be expanding?
Hold a while a think if that is the target of your life, you should move on in their direction, however, are there some more meaningful things you have not done yet…?
How you seen you daughter grown up and get marriage with her beloved boy friend? Did you feel regret that actually you had made mistakes in some of the decision that caused a lot of people loss of their jobs and their families went into trouble for years? Do you think that you should help to create more job opportunity for the society when you are the Powerful CEO? Mayor of a city or a wealthy celebrity of the society? Did you try to give away some of your possession or asset that could possibly helping other families living much better without any effect to your quality of living? There are still a lot of thing we have not accomplished…
Well, Chinese tradition is to try to keep the power and Asset and pass on to his son and daughters. But does it help them at all? Yes, If I were them probably I do the same., but I would leave some of them for the other people who I even Never seen, known them at all, As God said, to give is better than to Take..
Recently God took two lives in our companies, one by the H1N1 and one is unknown, could not wake up one Saturday morning, aged 30 , single…
PHD holder…
Well, Today we are still alive, try to do something helping other people in need and take a few seconds in the morning on what we should do helping people in the Day.
Feverip
But how knows how much hard work they have been working and did they best they can make at the top of his peak in his career?
Imagine that you are the Vice President of the world largest consumer product group of business which has a capability of few Billions of dollar profit every year. And you work hard from eight to seven everyday and working at your tiny and crackberry for push mails after office hours! Imagine you had to talk to your beloved that sorry you had to leave for attend a phone conference during your vacation to Phuket or New Zealand?
When we you wife called you to the office asking when you could reach home for dinner, you were seem unable to meet the committed time to reach home afterwards! When you daughter shows you her examination result you could hardly hard to find 30 mins. of time for you to review with her result and give your comment on how she is studying. Sometimes you had hard time to memorize all the birthdays of your wife, mother, daughter and son. Do not mention anniversary of marriage.
On the other hand in front your handful good friends eye can show off our recent purchased Limited edition of Patek Philippe Complication watch or a skeleton Platinum Audemars Piguet perpetual calendar driven by a tiny and sophisticated Tourbillion? You had a pair of Rockport loudpskeakd weighed 250Kgf each, your new order Porsche twin turbo car?!
Well, is that an insignia of success? Is that the ultimate target that you would expect an appreciation from your friends, customer, supplier, friends and people you meet at restaurant and banks? Is that the kind of recognition when you select you car makers type instead of the function of it, is that you care more about where your house is situated more than the house itself as to tell which part of Hong Kong you are from?
No, I do not think so, as you know you should be aware that the God will one day testify you when you are at Top of Peak of your carrier, your successful in digging more fortune from your investment and your job?
A friend of mine is a VP of a world largest business player of consumer communication device. What I know him is that he got the supreme power to mobilize resources from one supplier to another, he is well paid at USD$300K a year, he is a man of knowledge, capability, management skill and charisma. Who knows that one day all theses will be taken away as their European headquarters closed the operations in USA! And at the same time his house was totally demolished by torando! But I think he should be glad that one thing he was blessed with his family, everyone in the family is untouched in the accident, they can start all over again. Who know one day he can be a CEO of a fortune 500 company, Who knows of he will be the mayor of the City?
All we have to do is to take a brake when we reach the top of peak in your career, try to figure out what if I would be CEO of a Company, what’s the next target? And what if I reach the new target then, what else I can do to make my fame, money and power be expanding?
Hold a while a think if that is the target of your life, you should move on in their direction, however, are there some more meaningful things you have not done yet…?
How you seen you daughter grown up and get marriage with her beloved boy friend? Did you feel regret that actually you had made mistakes in some of the decision that caused a lot of people loss of their jobs and their families went into trouble for years? Do you think that you should help to create more job opportunity for the society when you are the Powerful CEO? Mayor of a city or a wealthy celebrity of the society? Did you try to give away some of your possession or asset that could possibly helping other families living much better without any effect to your quality of living? There are still a lot of thing we have not accomplished…
Well, Chinese tradition is to try to keep the power and Asset and pass on to his son and daughters. But does it help them at all? Yes, If I were them probably I do the same., but I would leave some of them for the other people who I even Never seen, known them at all, As God said, to give is better than to Take..
Recently God took two lives in our companies, one by the H1N1 and one is unknown, could not wake up one Saturday morning, aged 30 , single…
PHD holder…
Well, Today we are still alive, try to do something helping other people in need and take a few seconds in the morning on what we should do helping people in the Day.
Feverip
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Congratulations to those who were born in 40's, 50's and 60's
CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL MY FRIENDS WHO WERE BORN IN THE1940's, 50's, and early 60'sFirst, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us and lived in houses made of asbestos.
They took aspirin, ate century eggs, salted fish, salt eggs and bean Curb, raw egg products, Sardines sliced pork from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes or cervical cancer.Then after that trauma, our baby cots were covered with bright coloured lead-based paints.We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets or shoes, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.
We never washed hands and never had soap for hand washing and had never heard of SARS, HiN1, HiN2 or H1NN!!
We eat cockroaches, spider, swallowed new borne mice… we did no get stomach trouble.
We go beach learning swimming alone, we did not get drowned, I Went to Kowloon City to watch the drugs addicts on how to “take” their opium and heroin, and I did not get on it.
We ate rice with lark and soya sauce in winter, a lot of eggs, but seem we had no cholesterol problem. Probably we did not have KFC, MacDonald, Pizza Hut, or Burger King too much at that time.
We ate butter not plastic as we put a lot of butter onto the bread, a lot of sugar into the milk tea but we did not have any diabetes. May be we had a lot of walking and a lot of sweat all day outside the house.
I walked to School everyday about loom from Ngai Tau kok to Mongkok Queen Elizabeth School in order to save 40 cents to buy toys, only till now I know that was a great training to my heart and cardiac system.
As children, we would hardly have experienced ride in cars at all till I was 20, we had not seen any car accidents as we had no air bags.
We drank water from the park hose and NOT from a bottle. As we did not buy water in bottle in that time, No one I know bought water, we went to toilet in the park and drink like a fish after the game.
As I did not know what Supermarket or Seven Eleven as we did not have. Only we could go home for boiled water. That took half an hour on foot.
We ate a lot of moon cakes, no one stops us and no one get problem after the moon cake, Nowadays, no one can afford to take 2 double yolk Moon cake a day We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soft drinks with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight.
because......WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our hand made go-carts out of old prams and then ride down the road at Caine Road, only to use our foot as the brakes. We went up hill catching spider for collection, never afraid of being bite.
We went to the Big World Cinema for watching movie at HKD0.2 a movie Sunday Morning. I can still remember all the stories of the movie, though it was black and white but we find a lot of excitement. Now you can watch any movie at home VOD, of DVD, but seems that is too easy to get and too easy to forget!
We did not have Play stations, Nintendo Wii , X-boxes, no video games at all, no video/dvd films, No mobile phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms..........
WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside to the gathering places and found them! We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were noLawsuits from these accidents.We eat a lot of oily stuff in the Chinese New Year but never filled enough, we were hungry as we played a lot.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!
We went to Peddler Street to watch other school girls real underwear and bet the colour for ten cents, Not like those stupid chap that watch it on the monitor sceen on internet...nowadays!
We poured water and stuffed used battery cells into cars exhaust pipe and watched from far and see how the water jet and smokes would be generated! Especial treat to thought who drove a big car with a Star in the front.
Our parents didn't invent stupid names for their kids like Chloe, Kitty, Yuki Victoria…but father in church assigned us names with Peter, Paul, Mary and Sandy!
Mother went to church for milk powder and raised a family of 2 boys and two girls! We did not feel shame as that was very Delicious milk drinks.
We had public exams and we had no one go for suicide for unexpected result. I was happy to go for technical school as I did not feel shame not able to enter The University of Hong Kong and programmed to be lawyers, Doctor and or Architect after three years.
And YOU are one of them!
CONGRATULATIONS!You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good.And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.
They took aspirin, ate century eggs, salted fish, salt eggs and bean Curb, raw egg products, Sardines sliced pork from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes or cervical cancer.Then after that trauma, our baby cots were covered with bright coloured lead-based paints.We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets or shoes, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.
We never washed hands and never had soap for hand washing and had never heard of SARS, HiN1, HiN2 or H1NN!!
We eat cockroaches, spider, swallowed new borne mice… we did no get stomach trouble.
We go beach learning swimming alone, we did not get drowned, I Went to Kowloon City to watch the drugs addicts on how to “take” their opium and heroin, and I did not get on it.
We ate rice with lark and soya sauce in winter, a lot of eggs, but seem we had no cholesterol problem. Probably we did not have KFC, MacDonald, Pizza Hut, or Burger King too much at that time.
We ate butter not plastic as we put a lot of butter onto the bread, a lot of sugar into the milk tea but we did not have any diabetes. May be we had a lot of walking and a lot of sweat all day outside the house.
I walked to School everyday about loom from Ngai Tau kok to Mongkok Queen Elizabeth School in order to save 40 cents to buy toys, only till now I know that was a great training to my heart and cardiac system.
As children, we would hardly have experienced ride in cars at all till I was 20, we had not seen any car accidents as we had no air bags.
We drank water from the park hose and NOT from a bottle. As we did not buy water in bottle in that time, No one I know bought water, we went to toilet in the park and drink like a fish after the game.
As I did not know what Supermarket or Seven Eleven as we did not have. Only we could go home for boiled water. That took half an hour on foot.
We ate a lot of moon cakes, no one stops us and no one get problem after the moon cake, Nowadays, no one can afford to take 2 double yolk Moon cake a day We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soft drinks with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight.
because......WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
We would spend hours building our hand made go-carts out of old prams and then ride down the road at Caine Road, only to use our foot as the brakes. We went up hill catching spider for collection, never afraid of being bite.
We went to the Big World Cinema for watching movie at HKD0.2 a movie Sunday Morning. I can still remember all the stories of the movie, though it was black and white but we find a lot of excitement. Now you can watch any movie at home VOD, of DVD, but seems that is too easy to get and too easy to forget!
We did not have Play stations, Nintendo Wii , X-boxes, no video games at all, no video/dvd films, No mobile phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms..........
WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside to the gathering places and found them! We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were noLawsuits from these accidents.We eat a lot of oily stuff in the Chinese New Year but never filled enough, we were hungry as we played a lot.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!
We went to Peddler Street to watch other school girls real underwear and bet the colour for ten cents, Not like those stupid chap that watch it on the monitor sceen on internet...nowadays!
We poured water and stuffed used battery cells into cars exhaust pipe and watched from far and see how the water jet and smokes would be generated! Especial treat to thought who drove a big car with a Star in the front.
Our parents didn't invent stupid names for their kids like Chloe, Kitty, Yuki Victoria…but father in church assigned us names with Peter, Paul, Mary and Sandy!
Mother went to church for milk powder and raised a family of 2 boys and two girls! We did not feel shame as that was very Delicious milk drinks.
We had public exams and we had no one go for suicide for unexpected result. I was happy to go for technical school as I did not feel shame not able to enter The University of Hong Kong and programmed to be lawyers, Doctor and or Architect after three years.
And YOU are one of them!
CONGRATULATIONS!You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good.And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Same Service
Same Service ·
A husband visited a marriage counselor and said, "When we were first married, I would come home from the office, my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking.
Now after ten years it's all different, I come home, the dog brings the slippers and my wife runs around barking."
"Why complain?" said the counselor. "You're still getting the same service!"
Love Your Enemy
From his death bed, the husband called his wife and said, "One month after I die I want you to marry Samy." "Samy! But he is your enemy!"
"Yes, I know that! I've suffered all these years so let him suffer now."
A husband visited a marriage counselor and said, "When we were first married, I would come home from the office, my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking.
Now after ten years it's all different, I come home, the dog brings the slippers and my wife runs around barking."
"Why complain?" said the counselor. "You're still getting the same service!"
Love Your Enemy
From his death bed, the husband called his wife and said, "One month after I die I want you to marry Samy." "Samy! But he is your enemy!"
"Yes, I know that! I've suffered all these years so let him suffer now."
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